Avoid conflict on Zoom with these five tips.

Never mind your cat crawling over your keyboard or a partner walking behind you in pajamas—or less. But the new realities of working from home and zooming for most of your business day present challenges. And not just when you get the alert that your Internet connection is unstable.

When body language is literally unseen, and all someone can ascertain from you are facial expressions, business communication is fraught with possible landmines—and it is particularly perilous for women, who are judged more harshly on their appearance, their responses, even tone of voice.

“When body language is literally unseen, #business #communication is fraught with possible landmines—and it is particularly perilous for women. #ZoomFatigue #WFH”

Someone claims you seem disengaged. Someone else harangues you for stepping away from your seat for a moment—not knowing that there was a true emergency in another room of your house. Someone is insulted that it looks like you rolled your eyes when you may have had something in your eye.

Millions of women WFH are finding the remote challenges that lack benefit of the doubt can be detrimental to their careers.

“Millions of women #WFH are finding the remote challenges that lack benefit of the doubt can be detrimental to their careers. #careersucesss #COVID”

“Just 29% of women say working from home during the coronavirus era has positively affected their career, compared with 57% of men, according to a July poll of 1,051 adults in the U.S. The study, conducted by Qualtrics for Boardlist, a marketplace for female and minority corporate board talent, also found a sizable gender gap in promotions among remote-employed parents. Only 9% of women with children at home had been promoted in this new remote-work era, but 34% of men with children at home reported getting promoted during the same period,” LiveMint reports.

Here are five key strategies to avoid Zoom conference conflict. These may seem minor, but if all you have to go on is how you come off on a screen, then it is best to maximize your perception—and positively.

“@Takeleadwomen shares five key strategies to avoid #Zoom conference conflict. These may seem minor, but if all you have to go on is how you come off on a screen, then it is best to maximize your perception. #careersuccess”

Read more in Take The Lead on WFH

No raised eyebrows. If all that the participants in the meeting can see is you from your neck up, even the slightest facial expression looms large. Your eyebrow raise may be instinctive and reactive, but learn to control it and do not exhibit displeasure, surprise or disdain. Stay neutral. Just smile slightly when appropriate. “Subconscious intake now requires purposeful thought: Our brains used to absorb nonverbal cues subconsciously—a fast intake of breath, a tightening of the shoulders—that gave us cues about how to proceed. We now have to be more intentional about reading facial expressions and picking up on verbal communication cues. Being more aware of the impact of our vocabulary will likely end up making us even better mediators--but it is still exhausting to learn a new method of communicating,” writes Clare Fowler, Executive Vice-President and Managing Editor at Mediate.com.

“No raised eyebrows. If all that the participants in the meeting can see is you from your neck up, even the slightest facial expression looms large. #Zoom #WFH #Advice”

Mind the chat. You could be speeding along in your agenda, offering content and insight, not noticing that the chat feed is filling up with comments, questions and remarks. This may seem obvious, but this is not like a room full of colleagues whom you can see in person and get a sense when they raise a hand for a question or have a reaction that needs tending to. Let the side chat fill up, the Zoom can rise up against you. And you can be accused of being insensitive, ignoring input, being a tyrant, taking over without collaboration, all manner of negative accusations just because you were proceeding without occasionally looking at what was accumulating in the chat. Take a look every three to five minutes. Stop and ask if anyone has a question. Stop and ask if anyone wants to unmute and offer a comment. It is better to slow down than to have a hostile takeover of the meeting.

“Let the side chat fill up, the #Zoom can rise up against you. And you can be accused of being insensitive, ignoring input, just because you weren’t looking at the chat. #remotework #careeradvice”

Be deliberate and overt in your responses. Say out loud that you agree. Show a thumbs up if you are asked for a reaction. Respond clearly. You want to project that you are listening, you are engaged and that you are paying attention. If it looks like you are texting or doing something else, the presenter could get upset. Stacey Harris, associate director of Disability & Access Services and the first Student Life Fellow in the Dean of Students at Boston University, leads Zoom seminars for students on having difficult conversations during COVID. BU reports, “Add in the miscommunications caused by masks and the limits of Zoom and FaceTime, she says, and we’re going to have to be more overt in our interactions. Let the other person see you put away your phone, so they know you’re truly present. Say you’re smiling, since they can’t see it through your mask. ‘We have to build a new way of existing together when sometimes we’re not physically together,’ she says.”

“Be deliberate and overt in your responses. You want to project that you are listening, you are engaged and that you are paying attention. #Zoom #Advice”

Leave time for feedback. You are mindful of staying on time, mindful of accomplishing everything you need on your agenda. Build in extra time for feedback. In a Zoom meeting, it is possible for you to be completely oblivious to how your ideas, comments and input are landing. You could be offending someone unintentionally. Your jokes are falling flat. People mishear you, misunderstand what you are saying and it is all going awry and you have no idea. Schedule open feedback for 15 to 20 minutes in a morning call, or an afternoon meeting. “In a physical classroom, you can see raised hands or observe confused looks. It’s important to assess understanding and allow students to ask questions. An audio free-for-all can be a nightmare, but dedicated Q&A periods work really well,” according to the University of Pittsburgh’s Zoom Etiquette.

“Leave time for #feedback. You are mindful of staying on time, mindful of accomplishing everything you need on your agenda. Build in extra time for feedback. #VirtualMeeting #Leadership”

Listen. You are excited about new ideas and have a lot to say, but sit tight and just listen at times. To be the one who is always dominating screen time can make others in the Zoom conference upset. And they will either let you know or talk about you behind your back. Be mindful of how much you speak and how much you respond. Yes, some people may be introverted and not like to engage, but that doesn’t mean you have the right to talk most all of the time. Refrain from adding your two sense verbally. You can add it to the chat sometimes. Francesca Gino, professor at Harvard Business School, wrote pre-COVID in Harvard Business Review, “We fail to listen because we’re anxious about our own performance, convinced that our ideas are better than others’, or both. As a result, we get into conflicts that could be avoided, miss opportunities to advance the conversation, alienate the people who haven’t been heard, and diminish our teams’ effectiveness.”

“#Listen. You are excited about new ideas and have a lot to say, but sit tight and just listen at times. #LeadershipAdvice”

Clean Up Your Zoom Act: 5 Ways To Avoid Virtual Conflict

Info

Action