On Getting Over Yourself and Showing Up
“Know your audience.”
We hear this all the time, but how often do we practice it? Even if we think we know our audience, most of us spend a heck of a lot of time talking to ourselves. It’s only human, but it doesn’t serve us well.
As an editor, I see it all the time. Writers spend their first 2-4 paragraphs essentially clearing their throats, working their ideas out on the page, or telling me something they really want to tell me instead of something readers need to hear.
Yes, we have to push our ideas and opinions out there (this is about our power to do something), but we have to do it in context (this is more about influence and impact). If we want to connect with other human beings at all, we have to listen. Writing and speaking with our audience in mind is a way of listening. We have to know what is important to our reader, our boss or co-worker, our neighbor, our partner, or friend. Only then do we have a shot at meaningful conversation. Otherwise, most of the time we’re just adding to the noise.
We spend so much time telling women leaders to speak up, get out there, and take a stand that I worry we’ve forgotten about our audience. And why are women leaders so important anyway? Who is all this leadership for? Who is listening and who isn’t?
On the job, are you leading for yourself or are you offering something you know your team or organization can really use? Something your leadership team values? In your activism, are you pushing an initiative you think would be a good idea and is desperately needed in your community or the world, or have you done your research and identified a need?
There’s nothing wrong with sensing a need and responding to it, or “being the change you wish to see in the world,”—we’re often introducing new ideas that simply haven’t been done before—but we shoot ourselves in the foot when we fail to look beyond ourselves or the initial seed of an idea to make our work a conversation with others.
On May 1st I’ll be talking about all of these things and more in my Take The Lead webcast. Speaking up and leading authentically—this requires “showing up” and is about power/agency. Doing so in a way that makes a splash and gets people to listen? This is something else entirely, it requires getting over ourselves (getting out of the way!), and it takes creativity and patience. Knowing the difference between the two is crucial for effective leadership. Please join me next week and spread the word!
Interested in learning more? Join me May 1st or June 26th to talk authentic leadership, influence, and power. You’ll leave with a new understanding of the three and learn how you can use principles of authentic leadership to advance your career or move your projects forward, whatever your field. This will be a highly interactive discussion.
Read more posts by Lex Schroeder.
About the Author
Lex Schroeder is a writer and speaker on gender equity, systems change, and the future of work. She is a Leadership Ambassador with Take The Lead and is based in NYC. She can be reached at lexschroeder@taketheleadwomen.com. Follow her on Twitter @lexschroeder.